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About Deviant KatyaFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 9 Years
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Literature
I think i'll miss you forever
These feelings are too hard to explain.
I try not to get caught up in them. They exhaust me to the very core.
You say you have second thoughts. You say you don't know.
Oh, but darling can't you see?
The way my eyes sparkle when I look at you.
Oh, but darling can't you sense?
How happy I am whenever I'm with you.
I'm not the best choice,
Nor am I probably the right one,
But I hope you'll choose me.
Don't make hasty decisions, think it through.
Relationships are a two way street.  We can make it work.
Don't go biting your tongue, speak up.
Honey coated words and cigarette stained breath.
Nobody is perfect until
You fall in love with them.
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Literature
A Daydreamers Reality
It's strange. You make all these rules only to break them in the end. Falling in love? Oh, well you've done it all. You're a good girl, yet when midnight strikes you can't help but let your hair down and have your panties fall to your knees. What have you become? The crowd shouts throwing violent punches into the air. Logic is crumbling and your mind has become a dumpster for second thoughts and question marks. Have you changed? No, it can't be. You're still the same as you have always been, and though that is something you wish to believe the marks on your neck weave a different story. Alcohol breath and ash stained body; the crime is evident in the crumbled sheets and open condom wrappers. The smell of sex wafts through the vacant hotel room. No, this can't be. You're not like those girls who sold their souls just to have someone to press up against at night.  No, that's not how your mother raised you. The future seemed so bright with red roses and love letters, but now tha
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Literature
Cardboard Dreams
Love you say?
Darling, don't get your hopes up.
Fairytales have long gone vanished.
The heart is no longer what boys
Yearn to steal.
What's that?
Oh, but that is life.
You settle for what you can
Grasp
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Literature
Unititled
Could this be another love poem?
I hope not. The world is filled with way too many of them.
My heart is thumping and words are failing to explain how I feel.
Are you in love? Oh, no darling, don't you know?
I am not one of those girls. I don't jump head first into the water.
I don't let myself get involved in such foolishness.  Those games are meant
for younger folks. Heartbreaks, smeared mascara, and paper thin lies don't interest me.
I have no time for games. I have no money to gamble on something that may never happen.
Love has no insurance that fixes the dents inflicted on your heart.  It carries no guarantee of a safe return.
The sweetness is not worth the pain that comes after the sting. It is not worth the sleepless nights and whiskey stained breath that comes as you try to drown your sorrow.
It is not worth it.
But what if it is?
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Literature
A different perspective
I've never been the prettiest
of them girls,
With lips as soft as the petals
of a rose,
Or eyes that tug at your heart, pull
you in like the waves of the ocean
Boys do not like kissing me,
My lips are chapped, and feel rough
against their naked skin.
I have brown eyes, brown like burned wood or
your morning coffee that is bitter,
but you do not know since you haven't tasted anything better
My eyes are brown,
Ordinary,
Just like
Me
"How much for those eyes?"
Bargains are not placed to see the world
through my perspective,
"What an ugly babe, will she ever be wed?"
Destiny is decided by crude rumors and
bitter words
The scorching sun
Cracks my skin like an almond,
Drains the fluid from my body, leaving
it a shell for ravaging animals to rip open
My text has already been read,
Pages have already been touched by
liquor stained fingers
surging with quiet lust
that roams between the crevices
of blurred words and tarnished images
"Eyes for sale, brown eyes for sale"
No takers, nobody wants 'o
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Literature
Impression
To love I'm just a broken stereo
Stuck on repeat; no chance
Of reaper
To happiness I'm a stranger
Walking between the two lanes of traffic;
Maybe loneliness will want me
Hey stranger,
With your thick wallet, mocking smile
You think you got me all figured out
So, was it my worn-out converse?
That are famous to gravel, dirt, inch-high puddles,
Or the tattered, Led Zeppelin t-shirt
that helped you "get me"?
Was it my short, brown hair?
Or the baggy, straight, covered in paint jeans
That came from the men's department
since that was all I could afford,
That helped you decide of my preference?
Did my loudness,
Lack of personal space,
"Big rack"
Grant me the label of slut?
Hey stranger,
With your crude humor, piercing brown eyes
You seem to think that you got me all figured out;
That I'm the one-night stand at the back seat of a car,
That I'll be sooner holding a baby than a diploma,
That I was screwed up from the very beginning,
and 'future' is not something I will have,
Yet how can you kno
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Literature
past, present, future
You were, I am, we'll be…
Lost, in love, changed
They say
Time heals
All wounds—
but, Darling, it's still
Going to leave a scar
I thought it was impossible to—
Break you,
But now I realize
That you are more fragile
Than I thought
For months,
I found your face,
your childish laughter in crowds,
watched you move like water,
and then be demolished by somebody
Walking through you
And now I see
What a fool I was
For letting you go
Because the truth
Is easy to see -  
You were meant
To be
With me
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Literature
Nothing and Everything
I am
the girl
that is too scared
to turn around, or,
maybe just strong
enough
to move on
I am everything
you want,
and nothing
you need
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Literature
Hit me, i'll get back up
You can't hurt me,
I'm small, weak,
Your words, fists
aren't strong enough
to leave a mark
I cry at night,
You're blind to my tears,
to my pain, after all
it's just a period in my life
That I will soon out grow
I'm not loud enough
for you to hear what I
have to say, or maybe
I am, but when I talk noise
is all you hear
Lies told, I search
to forget, I search
for something I never lost,
I seek pain, happiness, love, pleasure,
Something that will prove
that I'm not dead
I can sing,
but I can't move you,
I can draw,
but a blank canvas is all
you'll see
So why are you here?
Why do you listen?
Why do you taint my air
with your cigarette stained pity?
Why do you stomp at my dreams
and then tell me to reach
for the stars?
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Literature
Leftovers
You're not good enough,
You have sad eyes,
Crooked mind,
Your skin no longer is soft and smells or roses, but is rough
and scars whoever dares to touch it
Carved names of past lovers
ache at your heart,
Maybe you were once whole, but the abandoned warmth
left no trace of its presence
Time isn't your friend, and what once was yours
is now escaping within the crevices of your grasp,
Wrinkles have settled upon your face, but, you were never
beautiful to start out with
"Ha ho, where have all the stallions run of to?"
You laugh loudly, voice horse from all the drinking,
Indulge yourself in the smell of burned cigarettes
as you take another drag,
Organs rotting, you'll stop once you're dead
Life is grand you say,
You know those words to be true, but with tears
clogging your vision you start to doubt
Standing on the edge; you fell long ago,
Hitting the pavement you didn't bother
to get up,
Smeared blood, stains
the inside of your thighs, imperfect,
You stopped looking for a savior
Fairytales
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Literature
What do you dream of?
I have dreams.
When heard
Some spit on them,
Others hold my hand in support.
My dreams
Begin from small to GIANT,
They are hidden deep in my brain,
Hidden, so that reality may not crush them
With its rough hands
My dreams
Are preserved in my heart,
Kept safe until I am ready
To reach for the stars
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Literature
A Better Man
There's an empty chair
At the dinner table;
Nobody has sat there
In a long time
A boy gazes with eager eyes
At the participants willing to fill in that spot,
But, those men are no better
Than the previous owner
He wishes
For a father,
A teacher,
Somebody to play football with,
Hike,
Go camping,
Teach how to pick up girls
His dad is not the man he wishes to be,
His mom is wilting away
Like a withered rose in the wind
With time passing by,
The boy's eagerness fades away
And he stops
Waiting for a miracle
Stops looking
At his friends with hungry eyes
For something beyond his reach,
Something broken, cut
Without any chance of repair
"It's what's best"
He knows those words to be true,
Yet, at night
He dreams without boundaries,
Dreams for something reality would crush
The boy stays strong,
Promises he will never
Abandon his children,
No, he'll be the father,
The man
His dad never was
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Literature
Sticks and Stones
I'm going to drink
My sorrow away,
Memories of what
I thought
I deserved
Colorful flowers I'll paint
Upon the white walls
Of my room,
Even is inside
I feel grey
If asked how am I
I'll reply "I'm fine",
The truth nobody wants to hear,
Not that I'd tell
Knocked down,
Kissing the pavement,
Act as if I've never been
Hurt before
Broken bones, I'll never surrender;
I'd rather die for what I believe in
Than live for what I don't
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Literature
Cycle of Life
Time passes,
Good things come to an end,
And though we ask for a do-over, second chance,
It is never the same
Life passes,
We get older,
Watch as friends come and go from our lives,
Seasons change,
So do we
Yet in our hearts
We remain the same
As the child that once was
So eager
To explore,
To experience,
Both love
And pain
Friends come and go,
And though we wish they'd stay,
Most of them don't
Season's change,
Leaves fall,
Children are born,
We get older,
That is
The cycle of life
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:iconhugqueen:
HugQueen Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2012   Writer
:iconnewhugplz:
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:icondumplingmomo:
DumplingMomo Featured By Owner Nov 11, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the :+fav::tighthug:
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:icon369dreamergirl:
369dreamergirl Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2011  Student Writer
I know it's been over a month, but I still appreciate the :+fav: on letters to someone. Thank you!:heart:
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:icondumplingmomo:
DumplingMomo Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the :+fav::tighthug:
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:iconpoetrymann:
Poetrymann Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2011  Professional Writer
:iconamongststars::icondsfav1plz::icondsfav2plz::icondsfav3plz::iconamongststars:
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:iconvelocity07:
velocity07 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2011
Thank you very much for the fave!
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:iconkurliq:
KurliQ Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks so much for the fave!!! ^.^
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for reading :heart:
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:iconlizheartcore:
LizHeartcore Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011
thank you :tea:
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:iconkarlynoelleabreu:
KarlyNoelleAbreu Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for adding "Riddle of a Different Shape" to your favorites!
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